HAPPINESS CAN BE A CHOICE

Did you know that the Olympics were originally an opportunity to make a truce from the wars and that subsequently those colored circles, which are their symbol, went on to represent the five continents united together as if to describe that sense of humanity, closeness and union that we should feel mutually among all of us inhabitants of the globe?

For better or for worse, in various historical periods, the Olympics have represented a bit of the moment they were going through; in a certain sense they were a wonderful stage to rebel against injustices and inequalities. Consider that only in 1922, thanks to a French swimmer and canoeist Alice Milliat, women were able to participate in the Olympic Games;

in 1936 Jesse Owens, a North American athlete, won four gold medals; nothing strange except that the races were held in Berlin and that a black man dared, in doing so, to fuel the doubt that the racist ideology of Nazism was not based on solid foundations in supporting a certain superiority of the white race!

Returning to the first lines, I would like to underline that unfortunately on the occasion of the Olympic Games the wars no longer stop and that those five colored circles seem more distant than ever. But this is, perhaps, another matter.

No history lesson, much less moral. I’d just like to get to the point by explaining what made me want to share some reflections.

More than one episode could be told about these Olympics. But I would like to focus on one in particular.

It happens that Benedetta Pilato rejoices in her fourth place in a swimming race (100 meters breaststroke style) and that the incredulous interviewer begins with: “but really!!!”. That alone would have been enough for me to be indignant, but then, not content with having mocked her worldwide, another ex-athlete, who comments from the studios, first defines her as stupid, wondering if she does or is there and then a liar… because it’s not possible that he’s really saying he’s happy!

Benedetta is 19 years old and has taught a good lesson to a lot of people by subsequently replying that for her it was still a dream come true to have reached that level of competition.

Often, the physical and emotional stress to which children, adolescents and young people are subjected in an attempt to make them perfect and see them excel at all costs is not taken into account. To the detriment of who they are, what they want, their times, their happiness.

In 2021 a young gymnast, Simone Biles, retires from the world of competition for a while stating: “…I have to do what is right for me and I have to focus on my mental health. We must protect our mind and body rather than do what the world expects of us…”. She stated that she felt completely overwhelmed by the expectations that others had on her and that for this reason she felt the need to “find herself” and understand that his value was not determined by the medals he managed to obtain.

And for the record, Simone is back and it seems to me that the break was useful to her. It is not true that those who stop are lost, often those who stop find themselves!

Now… I certainly take inspiration from these events for a very specific reason as well as for the displeasure it generates in me to see a girl happy with her achievement treated in that way.

But what does all this tell us?

Since I have been writing on this blog I have often addressed the topic of hyper-diagnoses in developmental and adolescent age; I have often said that especially in recent years, it seems to me that the little ones are all asked to be in a certain way, with the same times and the same results. Maybe this is the problem of this age?

This constant demand for perfection, where anyone who falls behind is wrong, anyone who doesn’t meet expectations is wrong, where anyone who is happy with their third place is a loser or a fool?

I started this article by talking about how the Olympics have in the past allowed us to address issues such as: the importance of having respite from wars, of seeing a more united world (like those five colored circles that embrace each other), of not endorsing discrimination between the sexes, of the stupidity of racism.

Well…so I like to think that these are the Olympics where happiness can be a choice.

Maybe this is the message that millions of people, children, young people need to hear loud and clear. Maybe what really matters is who I am and not what I do, the medals I win or the place I occupy on the podium.

Does Benedetta know that she will be remembered forever for this example of beauty and greatness and that perhaps she couldn’t have won a more important race than the one she took part in, sharing her joy and gaining the respect of all of us?

Yes! Because it takes courage to be yourself. Maybe even to be happy.

… who knows, we might find a way to let him know!

Valeria Verna