Admit it, at least once in your life you have found yourself listening to the sentimental problems of that friendship or acquaintance of yours which gave you the impression of watching an extravagant mix between an episode of “The Secret” and a circus show. You will surely have wondered why some people like to trample on other people’s feelings, as if they were a doormat bought from the Chinese shop at 50% off.
Well, if it has never happened to you, you better be careful because perhaps the unfortunate one is you; but don’t worry because you are not the only ones: lately, in fact, these romantically suffocating entanglements, made up of a thousand inconveniences and inconveniences, are increasing exponentially.
Cupid is certainly not a sadistic dart-shooting angel in diapers who enjoys causing these situations. It would be too much even for him. But then what is the cause?
It’s very simple: we want to be appreciated. We live for positive feedback. We are addicted to it. Appearing perfect is now our obsession, as if, if we weren’t, we wouldn’t be able to live up to love.
This twisted reasoning is now rooted in our minds and projects us a distorted vision of reality, so toxic that it gives off harmful radiation both for us and for those around us.
It is precisely the sick and maniacal search for approval that leads us to have such obsessive and destructive relationships: attention is the drug to which human beings are most dependent, so much so that, once we try it, we can no longer live without it. , sometimes suffocating those who provide them with possessiveness and the sweetest manipulations.
It’s not that poor Cupid who we have to blame for our trampled doormat-heart, because we are the only ones responsible: we deprive ourselves of love and we expect to fill the void within us by using our loved ones.
So the next time you’re crying on the couch, gobbling Nutella under your favorite blanket because someone made fun of your feelings, remember that you have two choices: wallow in crying and chocolate cream, or start loving yourself, and so to be loved seriously.
Elisa Sarandrea
We host on Papillon the article by the student Elisa Sarandrea published in La ZANZARA, the newspaper of the G B Grassi scientific high school in Latina, within a collaborative project with the editorial staff.
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